I'm really bad at keeping secrets. I mean really REALLY bad. Maybe it stems from my refusal to lie in a round-a-bout lying-by-omission kind of way? I don't know. All I know is that I've had a secret since Tuesday and I'm bursting at the seams! Is it a big deal? Not to most people, but I want to keep it secret from my family until we get to NY in August.
First off, no I am NOT, nor will I never be, pregnant. Ever. If my previous rants haven't tipped you off to this fact then maybe you should just stop reading because you obviously don't get me, my personality or my (somewhat odd) sense-of-humor. Me no liko kidso. I like babies fine, minus the getting up in the middle of the night thing. So I guess I like kids from age 1 to say...3? Yup. That's about it. At that point they can look me up when they're 30.
Anywho this post wasn't about my dislike of ankle biters. It's because I have a new toy, albeit a fairly expensive one...a new car! Whoo hoo! It's my first new car eva. As in eva eva. I bought my first (used) car at age 21...a 1996 Ford Contour. Then in 2003 I gots me a (used) Ford Focus ZX5 which I've affectionately called Fiona Focus for the last 7 years. But it was time for Mama to upgrade a bit. Mama works hard. Mama has paid her car dues. Mama wanted luxury. So Mama got luxury, naturally because whatever Mama wants...Mama gets. (that last line was meant to be sung...as in "whatever lola wants...lola gets..." nevermind.)
So I went and bought myself an Infiniti EX35. Here's the link for those of you who have never been introduced to the awesomeness that is called Infiniti. It really is as fabulous as it looks. In case you want all of the dirty details I got the Journey AWD model in Scarlet Silver with Wheat leather and maple accents. I also got the Bose and Around View monitor package as well as the navigation package. What all of that means is that I have nifty cameras that show my car from every angle (including top down), a built in navigation system and a Bose sound system with (massive) sub-woofer. And then there are the little things like bumper protector, illuminated kick plates, roof rack, cargo protector, etc. etc. My car has a better computer and bigger hard drive than my desktop computer. The car is so f-in awesome that when I told the salesperson that I wanted to sleep in it I wasn't kidding. It's insane. It's got so much fun shit in it that I sit at stoplights and giggle. Not to mention look over at the poor, miserable SAHMs in their little Lexus van-things screaming at their darling little tots. Moving on...Everything can be controlled by voice...from the "Music Box" hard drive to the telephone to the temperature and navigation controls. It's nuts. It's over-the-top. It's hot. And it's all mine.
